A századik poszt: Expressing your feelings

Which of your feelings do you let other people know about? Which do you keep to yourself?
Sometimes it's a good thing to say what you feel. At other times it's better to keep quiet about your feelings. Sometimes it's hard to know exactly what it is you do feel. At other times feelings are so strong they seem to overwhelm you. How often do you express what you feel?

A feladat egyébként bevethető mindenféle speaking, practice és egyéb elnevezésű órákon éppúgy, mint egy jó kis reading gyakoroltatás keretein belül; mindezek fényében a szint a tanerőre van bízva, aki, reméljük, felismeri az ebben rejlő pszichológiai fegyvertényt is, és azokat megfelelő érettséggel és érzékenységgel kezeli. :D

1, Anger

When you feel angry, which of the following reactions would be most typical of you?

A. Raising your voice or shouting at the person you're angry with
B. Explaining quietly why you're angry
C. Trying not to be angry (perhaps because you think it's wrong or unfair)
D. Telling yourself you're not really angry or that you've not really got anything to be angry about

2, Feeling sad or upset

When you feel sad or upset, which of the following reactions would be most typical of you?

A. Crying about it to someone else
B. Talking to a friend about what's upset you
C. Going away and crying on your own
D. Telling yourself you don't really feel upset or sad or that you don't really have anything to feel upset or sad about

3, Feeling happy

When you are feeling happy, which of the following reactions would be most typical of you?

A. Laughing and smiling, telling someone how you feel
B. Analyzing to yourself or others the reasons why you're happy
C. Going around with an inner glow
D. Telling yourself this can't last, it's not really true or it's not right to be happy when others aren't

4, Feeling disgust or dislike

When you feel disgust or dislike, which of the following reactions would be most typical of you?

A. Screwing up your face, grimacing as you say what you feel
B. Telling a friend how much you dislike or feel disgust about something or someone
C. Controlling your disgust or dislike
D. Pretending that nothing's happened. Ignoring the things or people that make you feel this way

5, Feeling frightened or worried

When you feel frightened or worried, which of the following reactions would be most typical of you?

A. Trembling, shaking or crying as you tell someone how you feel
B. Talking to a friend about the things that are frightening or worrying you
C. Going away on your own and crying about it or feeling bad
D. Telling yourself you don't really feel frightened or worried or that you don't really have anything to feel frightened or worried about

6, Feeling warmth or affection for others

When you feel warmth or affection for others, which of the following reactions would be most typical of you?

A. Touching, holding, embracing, kissing other people
B. Talking to a friend about the way you feel
C. Deciding not to express how you feel, perhaps because you're afraid you might get hurt
D. Telling yourself it's sloppy and sentimental to feel like this about people and pushing the feelings away

7, Feeling embarrassed or ashamed

When you feel embarrassed, which of the following reactions would be most typical of you?
A. Laughing in embarrassment as you try to explain to someone why you feel embarrassed or ashamed
B. Telling a friend later about how you felt embarrassed or why you felt so ashamed
C. Swallowing hard and wishing the floor would open so that you could disappear from sight
D. Pretending you're not in the least embarrassed or ashamed and putting an arrogant or cocky face on it
Express feelings directly? A answers: you feel something and you show it.

Talk about them? The B statements show ways in which warm feelings can be partially expressed by talking about them. Talking about your feelings can help you get clear about what you feel. You can get sup- port. You may start to build up the confidence to express feelings more directly.
 

Keep them to yourself? The C statements are about trying to control your feelings. Sometimes you may feel it's best to keep quiet about what you feel. You may not want to make yourself vulnerable before others. Or you may decide that expressing your feelings would be destructive to someone else. If you always keep your feelings to yourself, however, you may find that they start to come out in other ways.
 

Deny them? The D statements are about ways of denying your feelings altogether. You may think they're not nice. Or you may be frightened of their strength. Again, these denied feelings may emerge in other ways.

A feladatlap egyébként letölthető innen.